As for the Weird-Al’ed MST3K lyrics, I know what word you’re tempted to use to rhyme with “Fates” – but – don’t do it, man. Resist temptation ;)

Ill be of what help I can, Jason.

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Ok thats as far as ive gotten. Any help writing the rest would be great.

im using this version of the MST3K theme:

In the not-too-distant future-
Next Sunday A.D.-
There was a guy named Joel,
Not too different from you or me.
He worked at Gizmonic Institute,
Just another face in a red jumpsuit.
He did a good job cleaning up the place,
But his bosses didn’t like him
So they shot him into space.

We’ll send him cheesy movies,
The worst we can find (la-la-la).
He’ll have to sit and watch them all,
And we’ll monitor his mind (la-la-la).
Now keep in mind Joel can’t control
Where the movies begin or end (la-la-la)
Because he used those special parts
To make his robot friends.

Robot Roll Call: (All right, let’s go!)
Cambot! (Pan left!)
Gypsy! (Hi, girl!)
Tom Servo! (What a cool guy!)
Croooow! (He’s a wisecracker.)

If you’re wondering how he eats and breathes
and other science facts (la la la),
Then repeat to yourself, “It’s just a show,
I should really just relax
For Mystery Science Theater 3000!”

Serious, thats awesome. Nice job my friend.

You sure its not THAT Chris Cornell?