And so here we have the first ever (and last ever) all-text Unshow. Welcome to Unshow #52. If there’s time in next week’s Deadpan episode, I will explain the recent Deadpan strangeness ’round here.
GO NORTH. EXAMINE ROOM.
Anyway, I have received most – but not all – of the 60 Lines Readings. If you’ve volunteered, I still need your 60 Lines readings – - or a notice that you can’t make it, please!
I also need your hockey tunes (That also includes my song requirement due to the Phoenix Coyotes’ loss at the hands of the Detroit Red Wings. cough). I think we’re just about ready to shut down this meme.
I promise to say this joke aloud on the next audio episode (remind me), but I figured it was somewhat timely and couldn’t wait a full week:
Why is there an arrow on top of the Airbender kid’s head, pointing down at him? Wouldn’t it be funny if the arrow said, “I’m with stupid”?
It will be funnier when spoken aloud.
Why sure, climb into my spoon:
# reaper Says:
June 24th, 2010 at 4:57 am
Drive by
hay pan busy week.
congrats Jack
/drive by
# DJ Bunny Says:
June 24th, 2010 at 8:46 am
In regards to the whining, I meant, but it applies to Cindi Lauper too.
# Johnny Null Says:
June 25th, 2010 at 11:13 am
I think I saw minutes of Buffy, shook my head, and turned off the boob-tube.
# EssBee Says:
June 25th, 2010 at 11:16 am
Cj, I want a cheese sandwich!
# Amy Bowen Says:
June 29th, 2010 at 5:41 pm
The Smarty Hotties® said:
Thanks for answering my questions Amy :) I appreciate you taking the time. Can’t wait to hear your Chicago tune!!
You’re very welcome! 
# justa J0e Says:
June 30th, 2010 at 12:19 pm
Going to see a matinée’ of Toy Story 3 today.
I need suggestions for how to keep from crying in public.
# Nomad Scry Says:
June 30th, 2010 at 8:56 pm
We have a high concentration of lefties in the 
…
YAY!
AND….. the first of the week:
# Vanamonde Says:
June 23rd, 2010 at 11:19 pm
Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch
You are listening to Jack Mangan’s Deadpan. We are Deadpan. Deadpan is the Way.
Send voicemails, plz. 206-350-TOMI (8664).
or.
Send recordings: sphericaljackmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm at gmail dot com. With only 1 “m” in “sphericaljackm”.
Thank you for being Deadpan. This is a wonderful group of people, and I appreciate your continued indulgence through the strange times and the fun. Individually, we are mighty; together, we are. . . meaty? No, that’s not it. Together, we are not mush. We are Deadpan; Deadpan is the motherfucking way. Goodnight, Deadpan.
I’m not coming back after the – - oh, right.
Happy Canada Day, Canadiens and Canadians.
Happy upcoming July 4th weekend, Americans.
Jack: He was a computer program?
Ed: Good luck!
Van: I hope it was better than #3.
Happy 4th to all you ‘mericans. :)
My bit of the 60 lines recorded. Hopefully it’s louder than my previous submissions. It looks like this may work, or I might have to try yet something else.
Thanks, ditto.
Happy Fourth:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uXsmLMV1CrM
Van, that’s interesting, given the trailer where Puss asks Dokey to lick his butt.
+n
JB -”Offensive” is clearly on a sliding scale.
THANKS ditto.
I plan to drink and play with fire.
singing
…Freedom cost a buck o’ 5…
/singing
Survived Airbender. There are worse ways to blow a couple of hours. I wouldn’t recommend it at all to someone who wasn’t already familiar with the cartoon series. The movie does not stand well on its own.
I’d pay to watch the drinking of fire…
I’ve also got to say that Airbender was proceeded by the most lackluster collection of movie trailers I’ve seen in a long time. I can’t say anything I saw told me I had to come back to see them.
Yeah theres really only 3 more film I want to see in the theater this summer – Predators, Inception, and The Expendables. I missed Splice which I actually really really wanted to see. Ed I had the same trailer experience. Its all just meh.
Oh ditto.. “all you ‘mericans”. Youre one of us, ditto.
One of us.
One of us.
One of us…..
Its a love affair. Mainly Jesus and my hotrod.
I’m surprised this sort of crap still goes on (read down to why Liz Williams feels she needs to do this):
http://mevennen.livejournal.com/789295.html?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=twitter
Yeah Van thats not exactly a crap reason for her to be doing it.
Happy 4th to the american panites!!
Smarty Hottie sighting !!!!!!
I call dibs on the TSH swoooon!
All yours.
All hail Bob. I’d missed Lejon’s reference.
Happy and safe 4th, Fellow ‘Mericans!
The Expendables trailer looks really disappointing. You’re really going to assemble that cast and make a straight action movie? Really? This was an opportunity for 2010′s Snakes on a Plane. Oh well.
Thank you everyone for your 60 Lines. We’re almost there.
Stay on target….
Hey guys and girls. My mom & dad left a while ago and we napped. I should be working in the yard, but I can’t muster the energy.
We watched Green Zone last night via PlayStation Network. The download took for-evar, and the movie was a big bleh. The barbeque was wonderful, though.
Glad the family visit was great. Too bad about the movie.
CP: Dratsylvania — The Von Drats
Lady J comes home in roughly 15 minutes. We’re going to celebrate the Fourth like REAL Americans! Kielbasa and pierogi. Well, then ice cream, too. :-)
hooody hoody.
plan is on target.
massive amounts of food consumed.
alcohol in system.
changing into my nomex suit and proceeding to the explosive phase,
hoot
I’ve got the Monday Morning Blueeees!
So was there no new True Blood episode this week?
I’ve got the holy crap it’s late blues.
Goodnight :___:
Oh yeah, many thank you emails to send out tomorrow.
Goodnight :really:
Jack: I was not aware that you’re part Yeti.
Well, one benefit to having Friday off instead of today: virtually no traffic getting in to work.
oh come on Lo Pan- we can’t get 1 teeny tiny swoon out of you????? ;)
I always loved seeing the fireworks over lake Michigan in Chicago, but I have to say San Franciscos display on the fishermans wharf was beautiful. Hugh felt up to attending which was awesome in itself, and the show was very well done for being just a bunch of lights in the sky!
We have some of his family in town and they had a great time at the festivities all day at the piers. Lots of stuff for the kiddies and live music and food and all kinds of stuff.
Hope everyone is doing well today… time to get ready for yoga here
good day mush
Morning, DP!
Van, every TV thing was put on hold this weekend for July 4th. Boo.
Sly B and I played Rock Band last night, and we did so well, the neighborhood was cacophonous with fireworks until about 1 a.m. Yawn.
Now to treat today like a Sunday and do laundry and clean the house.
^ + (We didn’t even get a new Dr. Who on BBC America this weekend!!)
It was my second 4th of July in Florida, but spent very differently with different lessons learned.
Year 1: Upstate New York is very “rolling”. What we have wouldn’t be considered mountains by people in the Rockies, but they’re close enough for us. Central Florida is flat, flat, flat. Last year I was staying in a long-stay hotel while searching for a house so I could bring down the rest of the family. I figured I would simply walk around outside for a while and be able to see all the fireworks because it was so flat. Wrong. I was not in a residential neighborhood, so all the fireworks were pretty far away from me. As it turns out, when you live in a really flat place, every tree and building in the area block out EVERYTHING you think you should be able to see. I head, but did not see any fireworks that year.
Year 2: Fireworks are illegal in NY, and legal in FL. I’m used to needing to go to a park that is having a sanctioned fireworks display to see a fireworks show. With the amount of crap that went up on Saturday night, we correctly guessed that there was no need for this here. Last night we had a BBQ with some neighbors and watched as nearly every house down every street (we live on a corner house, so we have a good view) stated setting off all the same stuff we see at professional displays. No traffic, no hassles when it rains, simply wait until the last drop hits the ground and people are at it again. We didn’t really have problems with noise late at night either. They seemed to be done by 10:30 or so.
I think we’re going to like it down here.
Here come the hawks…..
Ohhhh yeah. :)
Here come the hawks = brilliant.
And in sad hockey news: RIP Bob Probert.
WTF!
Tre Lame
Usedhair: I loved that about the year I spent in Florida, too. There was something particularly magical about driving around and seeing fireworks going off all around you.
Jack: So glad you liked our rendition of “Here Come the Hawks.”
I fucking love Cocorosie. They also creep me out.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tu3EcAHdHlE
Welcome to the party…I’m only a day late…but I did catch some fireworks (this was taken last night on my li’l’ cell phone camera)
http://twitpic.com/22l1so
Happy Independence everyone!
Oh there was no party, buddy. But I do appreciate you bringing your own booze.
Lo Pan: Shut up Lo Pan. No one cares.
Lo Pan: “But I just wanted to strike up some fun conversation here as opposed to treating Deadpan as Twitter Jr.”
Lo Pan: You silly asshole.
Lo Pan: *sobs*
Lo Pan, can you please keep your comments to under 140 characters? KTHX
One year I was driving up from “the south” on the 4th. I was doing the loop around DC when they were doing the fireworks show and it was really awesome.
This just in: our asshole neighbor just got shit on (shat on?) by a bird. Haha.
I luv a good 3-day weekend.
Hey… I’m seriously behind on the commenting, but please know, I still love’ you all. I’ve just been enjoying 4 days off with my kidlets.
I start training for my new job tomorrow. I’ll be working 8 to 5 weekdays for a while. What kind of bizarre schedule is that anyway?
Anyway… I’m nervousexcitedscaredhappytwitterpated!
LoPanIzHott: Opened door today. Went outside. Shut door.
Just got back from watching Toy Story 3 and The Last Air Bender with my 13 year old daughter. Toy Story 3 was every bit as fantastic as we expected, and Last Air Bender stank to high heaven. My daughter likes nearly everything, but even she hated this movie. If you watched and loved the animated series (or like her… watched all 3 seasons 7 or 8 times) you WILL NOT like what they have done to it.
I really enjoyed the final 10 minutes of Toy Story 3. Without that, it would still have been good, but still not nearly as great as the first 2. I hope they let it end there.
(Spanish Mode was damn funny)
LoPanIzzzteh_Hotz: Black Dynamite trumps any film this year. Hollaifyahearme
Hey all…sent my 60 lines. Had fun trying to record them with fireworks going off. May have to send jack some outtakes.
Here come the hawks indeed.
I’m a lefty.
The house is coming together…
Enjoying a New Belgium Mothership Organic Wit.
Well, after being down sick and the long weekend, I’m returning to work for the first time in a week today.
Can’t wait for the email….
It’s just after 7:30 and it is already 78 in front of the AC.
Ack.
Hey Deadpan
Busy day today. In-laws will be in around supper time.
Since we’re not exactly sure what time they will be in (they’re driving in with other family), I’m putting pineapple chicken in the crockpot, then it will be ready/warm for whenever they get here.
here come the hawks!!! yay!!! Can’t wait to hear it!!! Hope we can get a play by play in this coming weekend after the fam leaves for chicago.
LoPan- no swoon? :( I’ve lost my mojo. lol. heh.
glad to hear people enjoyed their 4th’s
cj congrats for the new job! I just started a new job recently myself
I am supposed to be seeing Toy Story here soon with my nieces and nephews. Have most people been happy with it?
I did have the unfortunate experience of taking my nieces to see Twilight
omg it was so bad.. and all the screaming girls everywhere. Twas horrible!! But I’m the favorite aunt now.
cocorosie is awesome.. and yes a little freaky
that is all
for now
Bunny have a good visit with your in-laws. My visit with my in-laws has been awesome. :)
TSH: Very happy with Toy Story 3. I agree with Jack, the ending really makes the movie. It is something Disney never would have done.
Unfortunately, I know we’ll be seeing the new Twilight movie some time in the near future.
Because he’s in a school, hubby likes to see and read what all the little kiddies are doing and it’s that age groum ( grade 5 – 8) that’s into the sparklie vampires that he associates with. Because I’m such a good wife, I see the silly movies too *bats eyelashes*
in fact I prefer my in-laws to my own family :)
that is all
for now
for real this time
ooo.. I’m intrigued, ditto
ok
really for real now
for real
I promise.
check in with you later
cya
“in fact I prefer my in-laws to my own family”
Amen to that.
Good morning, DP!
“cya”
That was a quick hop in, ditto. Have a good one.
Ok, blond moment. Sorry, ditto.
By Andrea
LoPanLeevzEmWetz: Got up this morning. Had coffee. Drove to work.
LoPanIzTeh_Schitz: Swooned today. Think Ill go for a walk outside now.
“By Andrea” I guess it could have been worse, I could have said “buy Andrea”
I really need to go put my head in a bucket…
Just saw ‘White Materials’, if I was the analysing type I would go on about how the film relates to obsession and the ending of White supremacy in Africa, but I’m not so I well just say that the movie was interesting.
Just don’t see if you like Disney endings…
* follows @LoPanLeevzEmWetz *
* swoons *
Just out of curiosity, how does one fix a bucket with a straw? Last time I checked, there was a hole in the straw, too.
How very… strange
http://vimeo.com/12764233
LoPanLeevzEmWtez iz now a fan of @EssBee.com.
Wait how does this work again?
For you i-pad owners
http://nodwick.humor.gamespy.com/Images/simonpeggipad.jpg
Lo Pan: Stop using the garden hose. There’s a water shortage don’t ya know
So Lo Pan, what’s below your airport?
http://castroller.com/podcasts/StuffTheyDont/1714542-Beneath%20the%20Surface%20of%20the%20Denver%20Airport
LoPanLeevz’MDry: @EnergizerBunny Oh theres been conspiracies about DIA since it opened. Its awesome. There truly some bizarre stuff inside and out. Best airport evar.
EnergizerBunny: @LoPanWithTheFuzzyTowel: I’ll stick with dinosaurs and cows.
I hit a wrong button on my computer, now I think it’s stuck.
That is nuts! DIA, not the towel.
Yup, I had to tell it to end Excel. Good thing I just saved
I love the Stuff They Don’t Want You To Know podcast. They tell you about some really crazy stuff in under five minutes.
Add me to the “prefers the in-laws to blood family” list.
Well, I have to go get some groceries for my cupboard. Don’t want the in-laws to starve
Babylonian Twins goes free for the day on the app store:
http://www.freeappaday.com/napp.php?id=231
Good Morning, everybody, and Lo Pan.
Hard waking up after that weekend. I am fairly certain that this Nipple is being brought to you by Starbuck (Yes, I’m at laser point).
I may trickle in through the day.
Praise Bob. All hail Discordia.
Jeremy – sorry about the noise. We got a little out of hand this year.
TSH – I think the general consensus is … not the best of the three movies but probably one of the best of the year. Another hit for PIXAR.
Take a hanky. You have been warned.
Hey gang, long time no post. My folks are in town, so we’ve been spending a lot of time with them. We are heading out to San Diego for a 5 day vacation. Hope to see Sea World and Lego Land and the beach. I’ll probably continue to be sparce for the next few days or so.
LoPanControlYourself: @LeJoN Is it the Starbuck that is making you trickle? Wakka.
!!!! did I get a swoon??? yay!! :)
welcome all to the in-laws better than blood club.
I have a thing, maybe even a fetish you could say, for talking inanimate objects. Talking toys, talking furniture, even making animals talk for some reason always gets me. I absolutely adored Fantasia and Brave Little Toaster as a child. Obsessively LOVED those movies. So Toy story is a definite watch for me. I will indeed bring a hanky. I cried so much at Wall-E and Up it was insane :)
“fetish”
rulz
I haz returned. Now nobody will go hungry in my house
LoPanHits_teh_Spotz: @TSH Toast is indeed delish.
Lo PanZ: Nah, Dirk Benedict never did anything for me…
Damnit!
I’ve got Yankovic’s Germs running in my head… Stupid Stupid Stupid parody of NIN…STupid Stupid
They’re all over me.
Can’t get’em off of me.
They’re all over me.
…Microscopic Bacteria….
GAH!
LoPanasBrothers: @Lejonz Is having Germs in your head a direct correlation to thinking about Dirk Benedict?
L P Z – Sure. He infected me as a child. Now I haz da lost in space chased by Cylons blooz…
BlessedBeezLoPan: @LJNfCAZ Himz also dont fergets Faceman
LoTothePanZ: Oh, sure, Templeton Peck… He has me getting stuff on the cheep and Da Womyns for free…
LoFerRealz: @LeJonJon OMFG dems reallyz the only showz him was knows fer? My my my
I met Dirk Benedict he was an… interesting person.
EnergizerBunny: @LoOfThePans Dirk was in a Zork game. Grand Inquisitor. He played an Indiana Jones type of character. It was fun.
Yeah! My spreadsheets reconcile. Go Me!
LoPan’z'Nuff: @EzBunny My question still stands.
EB @Lo!IExist I also saw him in this. But given my penchant for B horrors, I guess it’s no surprise
http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0109595/
Lejon – Just finished episode 48 part 2 – (can’t leave comments from work you site is blocked and I will forget) I find it fun listening to you geeks talking about your favorite D&D Characters… what is this fascination with squirrels? and who has the fascination ?
(warming up on my Swedish)
ILoUPan: @BenergizerUnny Hez indeed hazd an amazing careerz
I dig anyone with the name Dirk. You have to have some swagger to pull that off.
EB @ LoThLorien I guess amazing is as good a word as any
CW: Moon
I have ever mentioned i love Netflix streaming
Netflix streaming kills PS Network downloading, reaps.
Well DP, I’m thinking it’s lunch time. Then I’ll probably play me some Alpha Protocol for a bit.
Will probably be hit and miss for the next week with in-laws here. We’ll see. Still have to do the day job which is usually when I Pan anyway.
Have fun, Bunny!
essbee.com
Lo, I’m glad I wasn’t the only one singing “…we’ll black you blackhawks”
Me n you, buddy.
Yeah I got all twitterpated. I may have pulled a “black you Backhawks” as well.
Wolf – Wow. We’re blocked? I’m not sure if I’m flattered or outraged… I mean, I knew we were a little offensive, but blocked?
As for the DnD characters, yeah… we’re geeks alrighty…
“Daddy, I Want A Squirrel!” -Veruca Salt
Magnetic Thinking Putty Makes Silly Putty Awesome Again:
http://www.ohgizmo.com/2010/07/06/magnetic-thinking-putty-makes-silly-putty-awesome-again/
What a fun day.
And by fun, I mean no fun at all.
A beer sure sounds nice about now.
“Oh I am sorry Champ, I think I ate your chocolate squirrel” -Brick Tamland
JM_notaplaya_Ijustcrushalot: It’s in-law week at Deadpan!
BTW Cj, that Woot shirt you tweeted would also be a big hit around my house. http://ht.ly/27nzp
“A Beer”
Damn, but that does sound good…
All right, Coors Lights all around…………..
no?
Pabst?
Schlitz?
Old Yeller…er, I mean Milwaukee?
It’s only Natural. Light.
Time for Highbrow/Lowenbrau?
Don’t beat around the Busch, Jack. Say what you really mean.
Mill’er ?!?!
I hardly even know ‘er
Yer all a bunch of Hamm’s
I love Rolling Rock, put more beer in a green bottle baby!
Boo, I suck. Let Sapporo a beer and drink and Singha songs.
Alright, I’m definitely at the point where the cure is worse than the disease.
Bleah.
Ed, are you referring to Stallone?
(srsly, feel better)
Any similarities between beer and PBR are purely unintentional. Oh, or Bud.
Ed: Then we’ll hope for a better cure!
A better Cure? Like if Robert Smith was more sober?
PBR: Purchase Better Refreshments.
$1,000 deductible, suck it.
My hawks failed to come on time.
Well let’s not forget the hero of Dragon’s Lair was called Dirk.
Yeah it’s time for bed…
That was gold, Jack, gold.
Wasn’t there a Dirk Gently?
JN: Yes, there was. Good books.